Taking Risk : Being On Your Own

April 4th, Spring

There is one thing in the world that many of us are scared of but don’t like to admit it. It’s being on our own. Being on our own is scary to us, just the thought of doing anything by yourself is enough to scare someone out their wits. But do we depend on others attention and time too much? Let’s take it to one extreme. It’s been said in many science studies that being alone and isolated does cause psychological affects in humans. But I think there is way to much mixture of being alone and then being lonely. I’ve been single for a while now and yes I am alone but I am not lonely. The difference is I know what I want and my own worth. Now I am not saying being single doesn’t suck at times, it does…a lot; but this isn’t what I see as being lonely.

After many failed first dates and harsh “hook up” sessions that usually end really awkward I found myself starting to just appreciate moving on my own. I learned to spend more time with myself and do more productive things. This took away that alone feeling. That lonely feeling as well. It was all avoided because I realized I depended on others way too much for my happiness and my day to day activities. Now let’s be real, we all want a little loving now and then but I see way too much complaining about sleeping alone, going out alone, and doing things just on your lonesome. I went to a movie by myself for the first time. I was absolutely petrified. When you think movie theaters you think cute first dates, a day out or night out with a few friends. So when someone told they have been , not only once, but a dozen times out to a movie by themselves I was more than flabbergasted. But this person talked me into it. When I finally sat in that theater with my popcorn (with extra butter because treat yoself) I laughed my ass off at The Wedding Ringer. I left that movie rejuvenated. There was something about being free enough to just watch a movie eat my buttery popcorn and laugh until I cried that was really liberating.

Now onto the real point of my post. (sorry for tricking you guys I love you so much!) I had a insane string of events that unfolded recently. It made me take this situation serious and do a lot of research on it. See…

Being on your own isn’t something to be afraid of. It happens. To all my people who are too afraid of being alone and are staying in unhealthy relationships please take that risk of cutting it off. You shouldn’t ever be too afraid of spending your time by yourself to the point you’ll risk your own well being. I’ve had a friend in that situation and I couldn’t take her taking the abuse just because and I quote “It’s better than being alone”. That really hurt my heart because maybe in her eyes she wasn’t this beauty queen but her spirit and her soul are precious and so beautiful. I am happy to say she finally found that courage and took the risk and now she’s stronger than ever and she is doing just fine. I don’t want to reveal too much about it because I do respect her privacy but this was something that really opened my eyes. If you know anyone in this situation don’t be afraid to be there for them. Give them the number below and reassure them that things will be okay.

  • The National Domestic Violence Hotline : 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)

Thank you guys for reading. I always wanted to write about this because I experienced it so close to me. I know this post shifted gears a bit but I really wanted to make a comment about it. Help someone if you know they are in this position. One phone call could change lives.

-Blake